final blog

at home, today, in San Francisco, I write the last and final blog of our trip.

I DID get to go rafting with the family down the Great Ganga on our last day... not only was it incredibly fun to raft through the rapids and be splashed by the cleansing purity of the river, but it was unbelievably beautiful to ride through the valley of the foothills of the Himalayas. I was not fully recovered but recovered enough and so, so glad not to have missed the final fabulous experience. it was yet another "people come to India JUST to do this one thing" experience we had! we ended with a lovely home cooked meal on the white sands on the banks of the Ganga... our last Indian meal together.

Matthew's lovely friend came to join us for our last moments, as we exchanged some gifts and then closed our trip with puja, which had such a deeper and more real and familiar meaning to us all. it was the perfect ending. then, his intention and heart with us to the very end, Matthew took us all the way into the airport to say goodbye, and with tears we parted.

he has been so incredibly with us still... we even looked for his suitcases when we arrived in San Francisco! I keep thinking of things to say to him or ask him and he is on our minds, in our hearts, and part of our constant conversation as we process the trip and all of our experiences.

it was an incredibly long trip home, and in the middle we spent an exhausted but exhilarated day in Hong Kong. the kids all spoke Cantonese to the natives, who LOVED that, and we had a taste of this place called China that was familiar and unfamiliar all at once.

now home, we unpack, sort through, unwind, and re-adjust to our lives and the time change as we will be integrating this incredible experience called India for a long time to come.

thanks for having shared this incredible journey with us.
with love,
Samantha

the final leg of our journey

Agra: the Taj

no doubt, perfection is beauty in it’s own right, and the Taj represents that sublime perfection: the balance, the symmetry, the texture and color, the hugeness of it. if you sit and look at it, you feel nothing but ease in your gaze.

and yet… after visiting the deeply spiritual temples, rivers, and cities of India… well, we felt that in terms of “Wonders of the World”…. this didn’t quite make the cut for us, to be honest. that said, we were glad that we went. plus the kids got to see camels and ride in a camel cart! they were thrilled because it was the one thing on the list we thought would probably not happen.

Mathura: birthplace of Krishna

on the way back from the Taj we stopped at Mathura, the birthplace of Krishna, and on the way Matthew told us many stories of Krishna and his life and so by the time we arrived we thoroughly enjoyed the temple, which turned out to be charming and very child-friendly (as Krishna is). Matthew is, I swear, a walking encyclopedia of everything India, Hindu, and spiritual, and has made this trip so completely accessible in a way it never could have been otherwise. the children have now fallen in love with Krishna.

David was commenting that with Matthew’s knowledge of the culture and speaking fluent Hindi, he has been able to make things happen in a way we never could have otherwise. I have been telling people that he has been our Golden Ticket through India… not just because of language and knowledge, but also because of his friends, who in virtually every city have arranged things, welcomed us, made things possible. we have had access to places and experiences we never could have otherwise. and he has devoted himself completely to us.

Delhi

brief stop in Delhi, long enough to have two amazing experiences:

we were able to see Dr. Triguna, enlightened Ayurvedic physician, who is now 91 years old and hasn’t been seeing patients for the past few months. Dr. Triguna received the Padma Bhushan award from the President of India for achieving the highest in the Ayurvedic field. for decades he had been seeing hundreds and hundreds of people every day. we arrived and Trigunaji was not there…but when they saw us sitting in the waiting room and Matthew spoke with them, we were invited into his home! (again, thank you Matthew!!). he read our pulses, and was amazingly spot-on about everyone. the biggest relief was what he said about Dania… that basically she has a disorder of her nervous system, but that she is fine and not to worry about her. she was so happy, and eager to take the herbs he proscribed, and it is so great to see her relieved and hopeful. I will have to think about her daily life and how to make things more calm for her. he basically said that in spite of our own individual issues, we are all in good health (thank God). he noted that Matthew is busy busy thinking thinking (no kidding!) but approved of his efforts to take care of his family. He said “you are doing your duty—very good!” he laughed throughout the whole meeting…

the other place we briefly went to is called Akshar Dam, which, frankly, rivals the Taj in it’s incredible beauty. the carvings were unbelievable (took 11,000 artisans, etc. 5 years to create!), and we ended up taking a sweet indoor guided boatride/tour through caves and scenes of ancient Indian villages and revealing the history of India and India’s contribution to world knowledge and culture. and it was stunning and quite moving. could have spent all day there… but because of cancelled flights had to make it a briefer stop.

Haridwar

one evening in Haridwar… found it a bit like a smaller, more festive Varanasi, actually, as we walked along the Ganga, experienced the Arti, and mixed with the crowd. walked amongst the sadhus making their way through the gateway into the Himalayas. met several of Matthew’s Purusha friends who were in town to see us and they were warm, loving, fun, brilliant, and incredibly generous. stayed in Anandamaima’s Ashram, which was simple, but lovely… Anandamaima was one of India’s greatest saints. she was the embodiment of Mother Divine, so her ashram was filled with the presence of Mother. unfortunately both Eliana and David ate something their bodies decided to get rid of rapidly during the night, but thankfully it was over quickly.

Uttar Kashi

first let me say that I will never again imagine that it would be easy for Matthew to come home… from his Ashram it is a serious hike in the Himalayas, a GRUELING 5-7 hr car ride on twisty roads, and that just gets you to town number 1 and close to flight number 1. this trip is not in any way easy.

that said, the real reason is the place itself. imagine a place nestled in the majestic Himalayas, with a view of the Ganges, perfect weather, clear mountain air, and quiet. this is the home of my brother. we stayed in a little cottage right on the water, and several of his friends came down to stay with us… again, friends that were warm, loving, easy to be with, kind, generous, and open-hearted. we relaxed, talked, the kids explored, and we all took the ritual full body dunk in the Ganga and felt refreshed and purified. it was incredibly lovely, and we all commented that actually it was one of our favorite places in all of India. Matthew arranged for pundits to join us for a very sweet blessing to the Ganga and for our family.

we hiked in the beautiful Himalayan mountains and from a distance caught a glimpse of Matthew’s special home. we were able to sit inside Maharishi’s cave, where he became Fully Enlightened and the spot where his ashes were returned to the Ganges. Uttarkashi is the place where Purusha are blossoming in silence, Maharishi became Enlightened, Maharishi’s Master, Guru Dev became Enlightened, Guru Dev’s Guru Dev became Enlightened…etc. etc. it is called the valley of the saints…it was the most perfect way to wind down the trip.

I feel complete, now, in my life, in a way that is new. part of it is this trip and India and so many things, but there is something else… seeing the home of my brother. being at the place of his home, his center, his world, his friends, his life in Uttar Kashi. I feel, through this, a profound connection to him and to myself. he was not just sharing India with us, or facilitating deep spiritual experiences, or sharing knowledge, he shared a deep, beautiful, tender part of himself. like sharing his journal… what is inside… with us.

Rishikesh

the drive down the mountain was a bit rough for me, to be sure… looks like I picked something up that my body rejected in all possible ways constantly, nicely exacerbated by twisty roads. ugh. lets just say that the side of the road no longer poses an obstacle for me in any way.

that said, Matthew had planned a delightful surprise for David and I… we are staying in a lovely Panchakarma clinic and Matthew planned for us to get oil massages by two technicians and shirodhara (warm oil poured on the forehead) in the morning. it was exactly what the doctor ordered.. fantastic. we have postponed our raft trip in the hopes that with rest today I will be feeling well enough tomorrow to go.

have I mentioned the kids and I have picked up some Hindi? or that the kids are better versed in spiritual knowledge than most adults at this point? or that they are now actually enjoying Indian food? or that we have all figured out how to get clean without toilet paper, go to the bathroom without toilets, shower with a bucket, get along without electricity, greet people warmly, become good hosts, live out of suitcases and go with the flow?

one of Matthew’s friends quoted Maharishi to me yesterday: Every day is life, tomorrow never comes. that is it, exactly. tomorrow is always in the future, isn’t it? today is now.

I have learned so much about myself, David, my brother, and the kids on this trip.

the kids have not for a moment ceased to amaze me in their flexibility, patience, openness, wonder, ability to adjust and adapt, learn, etc. David has spoken about how he has had a bit of a rough time of it… the nature of India and the trip has been hard for him, but he has learned a lot and is glad to have come… and really, it has been intense and a whirlwind for us all. and Matthew? Matthew has been unbelievable, and has spent every last ounce of himself for us. his generosity is endless and completely unbounded. not only that, but when most people come to India they are alone… we have not only been with Matthew, but through him surrounded by people who have welcomed us and loved us. it is clear the love he has cultivated in his home.

and me… I know I can only just begin to know what this trip has taught me about myself. I have thrived on this trip, and I see, now, that there is a part of me completely opposite of my life – a part of me that is forever unbounded by routine, schedule, place, living in a moment and wanting to just experience God fully and in every ounce of my being. I had begun to learn this over the past year, about myself, and that I become dead, really. hollow. without this part of myself having breath and space in my life. obviously, I have chosen the life I have because I love this part of my life to return to… the routine, my children and partner, my work, home, friendships, family, all of it. however, I cannot live there all the time. I see, now, so clearly, that I must go to “India” (to God, to wildness, to ancient spirituality, to utter stillness, to complete creativity) on my own, regularly, in my own life.

in some ways, when I think about everything we have seen and done on this trip, I would say we have bitten off more than we can chew – every day a new place, traveling the entire length of India, bottom to top and back again. that said, I would not wanted to have missed a single thing that we have seen and really, that is totally me. I want to bite off more than I can chew, I want to consume the world, and everything in it. a choice I made in the planning with the knowledge that it will be digested, blissfully and profoundly, in the days, weeks, months, and years ahead.

today, a boat trip on the ganga (hopefully I can join), a walk through sweet Rishikesh, famous former home of Maharishi (and the Beatles), and the sandals of Guru Dev... and then the return to San Fransisco... although clearly a "return" to something different and new. and with profound sadness and joy, a "goodbye" to Matthew.. for now and only in body, certainly not mind, heart, and soul.

Varanasi: infinite stillness, infinite wildness

notes on the way to Varanasi: a few additional reflections

me and not me
I feel I must be changing a lot but hardly feel enough space and distance to understand any of the hows and whys. I only know that I have some feeling of insecurity like: who am I? does anyone still need me or love me? maybe I have lost all my relationships and I will come back to nothing… even my relationships here seem adrift and I have a feeling of being all alone. I am aware that the person who I thought was me is leaving and I have to re-understand how to be me in the world only I don’t know who me is yet. it is difficult to take care of myself on this trip, but then I realize I don’t really know how to do that?

the kids
I have such a deep and incredible admiration for my children on this trip. absolutely everything is unfamiliar to them: the food, the culture, the clothing, the language, the landscape, the heat (we sweat through the day then sweat some more, although Matthew is quick to point out the weather has actually been really quite mild for India… we aren’t even close to “India heat”), the way their bodies are behaving, mosquito bites and other bugs, they are moving constantly from place to place. all they have is their parents, uncle, each other, and mediation… and yet, they remain open, present, in awe, and taking it all in. they complain so little! of course, we all have our moments on this trip, but I really am amazed by them.

my brother
wow. he is constantly thinking about us and our experience. arranging, making plans, negotiating, thinking of what is next, what would make us most comfortable, give us the best experience, all of our needs (ordering specifically for the kids, thinking of David working out and internet, trying to stick to the budget, trying to cover the list of wants I gave him and hitting each one) in addition to giving us an incredible experience of India. plus he is handling all the money so we don’t have to even think about it. he has been unbelievable and the whole thing is such a gift for our lives. he notes even the smallest desires we may have and tries to manifest it, all the time within our slim budget.

david
completely out of his routine and away from what is most important to him (exercise, his business, comfort, routine) he is hanging in there, staying present, wearing a skirt when he has to, being available in every way needed. it is not easy for him, this trip, and yet he is open, observant, experiencing. at times stressed, but still, hanging.

kochin
forgot to write about the awesome Kathakali performance we saw. plus a martial arts demonstration that was amazing. also lots of Christians and Muslims here, much more than I expected… don’t know what that means (to me) except that it is interesting and wonderful, in a way, to see a Christian church popped up in the middle with Krishna right next door.

Varanasi: morning of the first day

yes, cars have been added. electricity with it’s tangled wires. cell phones. plastic. concrete.

and yet
this is the “untouched” India I was excited about. actually, “untouched” is completely silly… this place has been “touched” for centuries by people from every religion and race across the globe. touched by dead bodies of billions, by the ganga since it has existed, by centuries upon centuries of pilgrims and invaders. touched by Shiva, as this is his home. touched by all of the great Rishis who have come here to speak, including Buddha.

by untouched, then, I only mean that here are homes made from cow dung. cows wander the streets with goats, pigs, dogs, and cars. oxen pull cars, men pedal bicycle rickshaws. vegetable stands on carts roll alongside modern appliance stores. people bathe in the ganga, every morning, 60,000 per day, cook with dried cow dung, pee by the roadside. women wear burkas alongside women with sarhis. monkeys everywhere roam the buildings.

the streets are utter chaos. I tell the kids they are required to attach themselves to an adult any time we set foot from our apartment (our little oasis with a view of the ganga—I wake this morning to see the sunrise over it). this morning Eliana and I (the early risers) watch monkeys at play outside our window.

the noise. the incredible intensity.
day one begins.

Varanasi: day 2

you know when you have an experience of God and then you try to describe it after? you say: it was “profound” or “intense” or even “beautiful” or it “changed my life” and you end up feeling like everything you say is trite and doesn’t come close to describing what it is like.

try to describe Varanasi.

home of Shiva, infinite silence. morning sunrise, people bathing in Ganges, pouring milk over Shiva Linga at the Temple where he manifested as a column of pure light. hub for spiritual seekers the world over, sadhus.

utter wildness. cows lying in the street standing in the lanes, four no five no six lanes of traffic every which way. alleyways that wind and wind and wind so that you have no concept of which way you are walking or which way to go. tiny rooms opening from the alley where people: sell, live, cook, repair shoes, sew, any thing you could think of. cricket games around every bend motorcycles weaving in spaces with people and no room. intensity, dirt, dung, smell of piss and incense, noise, and yet

everyone easy. living amongst each other. moving about their day.

sunset.
bodies burning, shaved heads, mourners.
puja to the ganga ma... being with Matthew means we are invited to sit on one of the front podiums and offer to the ganga as crowds looked on. one of Maharishi's top administrators shows us the temples and helps to organize the spiritual aspects of our stay.

Varanasi.

the third day we experience a yaga with 11 pundits. unbelievably powerful as our family makes a conscious intention to create the seed that invites nature to help us achieve our fullest potential.

9 days of mother divine begins.

then real Indian shopping and we all become pros at bargaining.

then we go.

Kochin

sleepy little ancient port town
Chinese fishing nets
antiques
lots of goats wandering the streets
western tourists
aggressive sellers to match
it's hot
and then..
a little synagogue
in "Jewtown"
where the Jews were given
sanctuary
and have lived
for centuries.
Indian Jews.
imagine that.

next stop... besides to visit the home of my brother and experience India, the main reason I have come: Varanasi.

we have been in India for one week

one day at the very tip of the world: Kanyakumari

took a train ride from Madurai to Kanyakumari which was really fun… had a whole sleeper compartment to ourselves and we all hung out in a big circle on the beds. sharing about India, God, the wildness of our adventure and just being together. Hezekiah took advantage of the “sleeper” part…. he, as Eliana said, has been fortunate to sleep from transition to transition as his little body gets the rest it needs from all the intensity. we all enjoy the experience of journey by Indian train… aware that the other cars are a bit different than the one we are fortunate to travel in. we ate a 5 dish meal that was packed that afternoon! delicious.

and Kanyakumari?
home of Mother Divine. meditated in the temple: heat, bells, talking, stone floor, and yet a deep, soft, endless silence more silent than any silence experienced. Matthew notes that meditation in the temple is the most important part… and while for a moment it feels odd to sit and close eyes in the middle of everything… the experiences are unbelievable. after we meditated, we go back to get the kids, then all of us, together, witnessing Abhishek as she is bathed and cleansed, so are we purified as her witnesses. Kanyakumari (matthew says) is one’s own individual ego, or “point” in one’s life. many of india’s greatest saints have come here before starting world movements—like maharishi had done. bathing Kanyakumari is washing one’s own individual path and giving a new direction to one’s life.

Dania, sadly, has woken with an episode… she sweats and weeps during the Abhishek then sleeps for the day, and wakes feeling better. she wonders if she has been purified and that’s why she feels better? thank goodness (thank God, thank Matthew, Jai Guru Dev) none of us have gotten sick from the food (no stomach aches or diahrea)… only the intensity? the huge change in place, climate, time, everything? it is quick and done, and doesn’t involve pain or illness… it is amazing to me how the kids insist, no matter how they are feeling, that they don’t want to miss a thing. as I write this, Matthew reminds me of the moment when they told us that making an offering with the pundit for Meenakshi was only for Indian Hindus, not for tourists, and Dania wept, making me cry and bringing tears to his eyes… and ultimately moving them to help us.

as Dania rests, the rest of us go from the Temple to a boat ride to witness the place where the stone formed a footprint where Kanya stood when she desired to marry Shiva. we then go and bathe in the spot where all three oceans come together: Indian Ocean, Bay of Bengal, and the Arabian Sea.

I am constantly moved by my brother’s efforts on this trip. every moment of every day he is planning and adjusting so that we are most comfortable, most exposed to the wonder, most fulfilled, our needs met, that we live not as Indians, not as Americans, but as Rajas (kings) as we go through this journey.

and we are off, by car, to Varkala.

Varkala: little oasis by the sea

this morning we wake to a beautiful view of the ocean… and right in front of the hotel there is a large crowd performing a ritual. we later find out it is the one day of the year, in one of the only (5?) places in India where people can come to perform a ritual honoring their ancestors and furthering their and their families movement towards enlightenment. at sunset, Matthew quickly calls mom on our way (it is 5:15am for her but we have waited for the last possible moment!) she helps us with names we don’t have, and then she and Dad meditate at home while Matthew and I perform the ritual together led by the pundit.

it is amazing to hear Matthew speak fluent Hindi and to help us navigate this place that is so foreign to us and so familiar to him, his home. we do not only travel the land, we have insight to the people and the places, while each state presents a different language, culture, ritual, food, etc.

the kids play in the pool, at the beach, David plays catch-up with work, and Matthew and I traverse Varkala arranging for… elephant ride! how amazing to ride atop an animal so gentle for it’s size, so beautiful. the kids are thrilled. we all are.


the backwaters

this morning we wake up and drive to our next destination: the backwaters of Kerela. it is actually really nice to be driving from place to place, as we drive through towns, villages, and cities, really seeing what the countryside looks like.

everyone in southern India has been so sweet to us… kind and warm. David observes that it takes very little to elicit a smile from someone that simply glows from the inside. One of Matthew’s friends tells us that one of the sayings he grew up with was: always tell the truth but always tell it sweetly, and the sweet part is most important.

midday we board a houseboat and begin our journey… past the homes and villages nestled along the rivers and canals. it is so picturesque, as people travel by boats, or by foot along paths and over footbridges, wash their clothing along the edge, and go about their lives among the coconut trees, goats, and chat with each other along the way. we dock to eat lunch and some school children on their way home stop to chat with us. their smiles are beautiful. the evening is lovely but buggy. we are all relaxed and gently rocked.

we have been here one week today.

David comments that he is “walking around India with a sheet wrapped around my ass” but we all note how regal he looks alongside Matthew, and how most of the men here in this part of India wear dhoti and how brave he is to go ahead and wear one too… so he fits, somehow, even though, of course, we often stand out as the only non-Indians around. I am proud of the kids for wearing the clothing daily and happily… and finally they are beginning to get used to the food and to eat a little more…. even enjoy it. I breathe a sigh of relief (as does Matthew). they learn how to get clean(er) without toilet paper. how to say “yes it’s good” (with a little shake of the head), Namaste, “it’s okay” (tik hai). they are absorbing, becoming comfortable here, we converse about the aspects of God and they know each name. they are eager for the stories… and the stories teach, teach, and teach us all.

I am finding it such a challenge to accurately portray the experience of being here! I ask the kids: was this what you imagined it was like before you came? they all say that there is no way they could have imagined this. I am enthralled watching them changed and transformed by this experience, this place. every day a new experience unlike any other they have ever had… every day something new they learn, take in, become. and me as well… as Matthew says, we can only just catch a glimpse of how much we will be changed by this experience… changed in who we are, our spirit, our connection to God, to others on this planet, to our own lives, our own assumptions about life.

I am so emotional. at times filled with wonder and joy. at other times feeling emotional and like I could cry at the drop of a hat. sometimes irritated and angry. in the Meenakshi Temple when I meditated I was filled with an unbelievable bliss unlike anything I have felt before… it filled me up and then overflowed and I wept.

Matthew helped us to begin this journey with pooja and a sankalp: our deepest desire and intention for our lives. we are to understand that all that happens to us on this trip is about that sankalp manifesting. I have no doubt of that, and as I see us transformed I see why he was so intent on focusing us on the highest before we began.

a word from the others:

David:
The Third Lane
Indians don’t drive as much as dance in traffic. Like dance, someone leads, which is the person in front. Like dance, the movements aren’t always choreographed. In India the rules of physics are what guide the driver’s decisions. The lane divide means pretty much nothing. If there’s no oncoming traffic, then use that lane. Even if there is oncoming traffic and they only need some of their lane, go ahead and use the rest. Mass, velocity and available space are the predominate rules. That, and if given the choice, stay to the left. Yet despite what might appear to be total chaos, if you realize that everyone really is dancing to the same tune, then it’s easy to relax. It only seems like a steady stream of “close calls” if you don’t know how to dance.

Dania:
It is very fun and adventurous. I learned a lot from India so far. I am really enjoying myself. some things I learned was walk into traffic, you should eat with your hands, walk barefoot, water bottles at the table, wearing no shirt in a sacred place and do not say please or thank you.

Eliana:
It is very beautiful and spiritual but it is also very hot and sweaty. I like India a lot even though it is. After I come back home I think I will want to come back again. I definitely am changing a lot. We are going on a lot of adventures and I love it.

Hezekiah:
India is very wonderful! It is very hot. And California is very cold, that’s a nice change! The Meenakshi temple is awesome! Then, you can go to another temple and there is a elephant in temple the elephant will only eat temple foods of the temple. When the elephant gets an Indian coin, it gives the coin to its owner and it gives you a blessing.

India is very different than San Francisco. India is Hot and has big traffic. I even rode a scooter! And when they drive, they always drive so close to each other. Not only did I ride a scooter, I rode an elephant! The elephant was very bumpy.

Matthew:
to be here with my family is to see india from new eyes…so much love we are feeling, such deep integration—
seeing my nieces and nephew touch the feet of sanyasis and my Indian friends out of respect, exploring Indian food with family, meditating in the silence and wonder of huge temples altogether, discussing God, laughing in richaws, shopping in the market, looking up at the stars on a boat in the backwaters…with my family…what an adventure and powerfully integrative experience…what can be said of this magic…?

its only the end of day 3 and already we have been here for a lifetime

Day 2 in Bangalore was beautiful... went to a party of Matthew's friends where he was a cherished and honored guest, beloved by everyone present and honored as a teacher who gave them not only a beautiful technique, but valued knowledge. Matthew, of course, is so humble about it all, but it was amazing for us to experience him the way others here do. Mom and Dad would have been so proud. It was quite moving and the way he answered questions with Maharishi's knowledge was so simple and yet profound... a great refresher for us all. We were invited into the homes of many, and had a profound experience of what it is to be a Guest here: Namaste (seeing the divine in others) is not just a thing that is said, or a thing of history, but it is deeply and truly real, here. We were honored guests, driven everywhere, fed, and truly from their pleasure. In the US we have no idea, really, what it means to be a host.

Then Matthew, the kids and I flew to Madurai while David stayed back. He spent the next day (Monday) having a very successful meeting with ComplianceOnline -- both on the personal and professional level.

And today/Monday for us? What can I say except that it is the first among what I am sure will be many, many days that will change who we are as people profoundly. Have no pictures of the places we were at (they don't allow cameras inside) but will try to take some maybe tomorrow at least of the outside.

Eliana and Hezekiah have been sick on and off -- fine at one moment, then vomiting and sleeping the next... and still amazing troopers as they don't want to miss a thing and so deal with the intensity and the heat and insist they want to go. Dania has been incredibly present and rolling with it all with Matthew and I... just there and taking it all in.

We went to the Sri Meenakshi Temple -- at first they did not let us in and Dania, Matthew and I spoke with pundits, cried...and we ended traveling with a pundit to the center of town/village and walking away with certificates that we were officially Hindu, and went back with Eliana and Hezekiah. We were able to go in easily... not necessarily because of the certificates but only because this is India: sometimes things are easy and sweet, other times intense and not easy, and made offerings... it was powerfully hot and we found ourselves in the inner, inner sanctums of a temple where the aspect of God that is the Divine Mother has been worshiped and has lived for thousands of years. It is impossible to describe the power of it... we were all completely immersed and swimming in the energy and intensity.

After 6, Eliana and Hezekiah slept while Dania, Matthew and I went to a second temple, this one to Kartikeya, the powerful little boy aspect of God. This temple was softer, and less intense, but still very powerful. And it was night, and dark, and we took it all in. We were blessed by a 46 year old temple elephant, who touched our heads.

Madurai is deep into India. We get many stares, being rare foreigners, in our Indian garb thank goodness, with a guide who speaks Hindi, although the language here is Tamil, which Matthew does not know, at least he knows India and temples and how to navigate that world. They wanted to let him inside but for us to be left behind... he refused, of course. Here there are cows, and traditional dress, and food. No MacDonalds here. Will for sure take some photographs tomorrow. And bless Matthew for picking hotels for us that are "western" and comfortable, a little place to find refuge and "home" while we are in the intensity of it all.

And today was a day completely without shoes.

david's thoughts about driving in india

as anyone who has been here knows, the driving in india is pretty crazy... cars seem to drive on the wrong side of the road, merge haphazardly, cut horizontally across five lanes of traffic, no lane holding at all, horns constantly (meaning: hello, here I come, watch out, etc. depending on the situation) etc. at first, it is a bit nerve-wracking to go down the road... but, as david observed there are almost no near-misses at all. he has these theories so far as to why:
1. indians have a very different spatial awareness -- they seem to be able to pass by each other by foot, motorcycle, car, auto rickshaw, bicycle, etc. and to squeeze through incredible spaces (so many vehicles keep moving through bottlenecks that it would take americans hours and hours to move through).
2. the culture makes it possible -- there seems to be a deep, genuine desire for other people's happiness and well-being. to not create stress or unhappiness in others. and so there is allowance and tolerance for things like sharing, not having to be right all the time, etc.

p.s. one of my favorite things so far is the gentle head wiggle with a smile, which means something to the effect of "yes, yes, it's good, it's blissful, that's right, I agree." it's so sweet!

already a lifetime has gone by

voyage to Bangalore, India:
left SF at 10pm, Wednesday night
SF to Hong Kong: 15.5 hours
layover Hong Kong airport: 3 hours
Hong Kong to Delhi: 6.5 hours (met Matthew here!)
Delhi to Bangalore: 2.5 hours
airport to hotel: 1 hour, arriving at 10pm, Friday night
48 hours later. subtract 12 hours we lost crossing the date line.
total travel time: 36 hours.
The kids were totally amazing. Such troopers during an incredibly long journey! And we all are adjusting to the time rapidly, although we find ourselves a bit tired and spacey still, and getting hungry at odd times.

Matthew: amazing, loving, has arranged for every possible detail for us, for our comfort, happiness, enjoyment.
Matthew's friends: humble, sweet, loving, kind, incredible hosts. drive us everywhere, spend time with us whatever we are doing, accepting every state that we are in, giving us gifts.
Bangalore:
smells like incense, flowers, garbage, exhaust. incredible amounts of traffic, motorcycles, auto rickshaws, people, shops. people are kind, sweet, patient, easy.

Ended our first day with an unbelievable concert: Jayanta Kumar Das (with Tabla player) played Gandharva Veda sitar concert for us, friends of Matthew, and the two important contact people at ComplianceOnline (David's sister company). It was completely beautiful.

Today we buy more Indian clothes, attend a luncheon hosted by Matthew's friend, and fly to our next destination.

The Trip: Our Itinerary w/o Matthew's Magic Included

1. Depart San Francisco, 1:00AM on Wed. March 19th
Fly through Hong Kong to Delhi, meet Matthew in Delhi, get right on plane
2. Bangalore
see Jayanth play sitar, party with Matthew's friends, shopping for clothing for India, rest
3. Samantha, Matthew & kids fly to Madurai, David stays one more day in Bangalore to meet with ComplianceOnline. In Madurai see famous temple.
4. Train to Kanyakumari. See temples, go to Nagercoil and see snake temple, see statue of Hannuman.
5. Car to Varkala. Spend a couple of days by the ocean (purifying), relaxing.
6. Car to Allepy. Take a house boat for a couple of days down the backwaters.
7. Arrive at Kochin. Port town, spice trading, incense trading, Jewtown.
8. Fly to Varanasi. Spend several days at the doorway to the final dissolution where pure silence is enlivened.
9. Drive to Agra. See Taj Mahal.
10. Drive to Mathura, the birthplace of Krishna, one of the 7 holy cities of India, the final one for Matthew to see.
11. Brief stay in Delhi to see Akshardham Temple, make last minute purchases
12. Up to Rishikesh (where Maharishi's Ashram was) and Haridwar, the gateway to the Himalayas, passageway of monks and pilgrims.
13. Up to Uttarkashi, town at the base of the place where Maharishi choose for his Purusha.
14. Take raft trip down the Ganges back to Rishikesh/Haridwar.
15. Back to Delhi, fly to Hong Kong. Have either 1, 2, or 3 days there, still unclear.
16. Arrive back in San Francisco April 11, 12, or 13.

packing & to do list (for today)

flashlights

sunglasses

a few smaller suitcases, a few day backpacks

Ziploc bags (w/medicine and empty both)

passport, visa, driver’s license, Schwab card

money belt

nice cotton shirt/light sweater on airplane

TSA 3 combo lock for suitcases

earplugs

eye covers

mosquito repellant for hats, clothing

computer lock (note porn block for kids)

converter plugs – adapter only (w/surge protector)

retractable cable lock

books for leisure

art supplies?

sunscreen

chewable pepto bismal

ibuprofen – adult and kids

TUMS

calamine lotion, hydrocortisone cream

travel toothbrushes (note travel conditioner container, contact lens for me)

thumb drives

waterproof computer/camera bags

gum for plane

Dramamine/motion sickness bands for me & girls

vitamin supplement for kids

band aids

hand wipes (non allergenic for Elie)

TO DO:

cars (drop Volvo, figure out Dug)

Dania sandals

figure out iPhone for D

photocopy passports and visas, travel docs