Kochin

sleepy little ancient port town
Chinese fishing nets
antiques
lots of goats wandering the streets
western tourists
aggressive sellers to match
it's hot
and then..
a little synagogue
in "Jewtown"
where the Jews were given
sanctuary
and have lived
for centuries.
Indian Jews.
imagine that.

next stop... besides to visit the home of my brother and experience India, the main reason I have come: Varanasi.

we have been in India for one week

one day at the very tip of the world: Kanyakumari

took a train ride from Madurai to Kanyakumari which was really fun… had a whole sleeper compartment to ourselves and we all hung out in a big circle on the beds. sharing about India, God, the wildness of our adventure and just being together. Hezekiah took advantage of the “sleeper” part…. he, as Eliana said, has been fortunate to sleep from transition to transition as his little body gets the rest it needs from all the intensity. we all enjoy the experience of journey by Indian train… aware that the other cars are a bit different than the one we are fortunate to travel in. we ate a 5 dish meal that was packed that afternoon! delicious.

and Kanyakumari?
home of Mother Divine. meditated in the temple: heat, bells, talking, stone floor, and yet a deep, soft, endless silence more silent than any silence experienced. Matthew notes that meditation in the temple is the most important part… and while for a moment it feels odd to sit and close eyes in the middle of everything… the experiences are unbelievable. after we meditated, we go back to get the kids, then all of us, together, witnessing Abhishek as she is bathed and cleansed, so are we purified as her witnesses. Kanyakumari (matthew says) is one’s own individual ego, or “point” in one’s life. many of india’s greatest saints have come here before starting world movements—like maharishi had done. bathing Kanyakumari is washing one’s own individual path and giving a new direction to one’s life.

Dania, sadly, has woken with an episode… she sweats and weeps during the Abhishek then sleeps for the day, and wakes feeling better. she wonders if she has been purified and that’s why she feels better? thank goodness (thank God, thank Matthew, Jai Guru Dev) none of us have gotten sick from the food (no stomach aches or diahrea)… only the intensity? the huge change in place, climate, time, everything? it is quick and done, and doesn’t involve pain or illness… it is amazing to me how the kids insist, no matter how they are feeling, that they don’t want to miss a thing. as I write this, Matthew reminds me of the moment when they told us that making an offering with the pundit for Meenakshi was only for Indian Hindus, not for tourists, and Dania wept, making me cry and bringing tears to his eyes… and ultimately moving them to help us.

as Dania rests, the rest of us go from the Temple to a boat ride to witness the place where the stone formed a footprint where Kanya stood when she desired to marry Shiva. we then go and bathe in the spot where all three oceans come together: Indian Ocean, Bay of Bengal, and the Arabian Sea.

I am constantly moved by my brother’s efforts on this trip. every moment of every day he is planning and adjusting so that we are most comfortable, most exposed to the wonder, most fulfilled, our needs met, that we live not as Indians, not as Americans, but as Rajas (kings) as we go through this journey.

and we are off, by car, to Varkala.

Varkala: little oasis by the sea

this morning we wake to a beautiful view of the ocean… and right in front of the hotel there is a large crowd performing a ritual. we later find out it is the one day of the year, in one of the only (5?) places in India where people can come to perform a ritual honoring their ancestors and furthering their and their families movement towards enlightenment. at sunset, Matthew quickly calls mom on our way (it is 5:15am for her but we have waited for the last possible moment!) she helps us with names we don’t have, and then she and Dad meditate at home while Matthew and I perform the ritual together led by the pundit.

it is amazing to hear Matthew speak fluent Hindi and to help us navigate this place that is so foreign to us and so familiar to him, his home. we do not only travel the land, we have insight to the people and the places, while each state presents a different language, culture, ritual, food, etc.

the kids play in the pool, at the beach, David plays catch-up with work, and Matthew and I traverse Varkala arranging for… elephant ride! how amazing to ride atop an animal so gentle for it’s size, so beautiful. the kids are thrilled. we all are.


the backwaters

this morning we wake up and drive to our next destination: the backwaters of Kerela. it is actually really nice to be driving from place to place, as we drive through towns, villages, and cities, really seeing what the countryside looks like.

everyone in southern India has been so sweet to us… kind and warm. David observes that it takes very little to elicit a smile from someone that simply glows from the inside. One of Matthew’s friends tells us that one of the sayings he grew up with was: always tell the truth but always tell it sweetly, and the sweet part is most important.

midday we board a houseboat and begin our journey… past the homes and villages nestled along the rivers and canals. it is so picturesque, as people travel by boats, or by foot along paths and over footbridges, wash their clothing along the edge, and go about their lives among the coconut trees, goats, and chat with each other along the way. we dock to eat lunch and some school children on their way home stop to chat with us. their smiles are beautiful. the evening is lovely but buggy. we are all relaxed and gently rocked.

we have been here one week today.

David comments that he is “walking around India with a sheet wrapped around my ass” but we all note how regal he looks alongside Matthew, and how most of the men here in this part of India wear dhoti and how brave he is to go ahead and wear one too… so he fits, somehow, even though, of course, we often stand out as the only non-Indians around. I am proud of the kids for wearing the clothing daily and happily… and finally they are beginning to get used to the food and to eat a little more…. even enjoy it. I breathe a sigh of relief (as does Matthew). they learn how to get clean(er) without toilet paper. how to say “yes it’s good” (with a little shake of the head), Namaste, “it’s okay” (tik hai). they are absorbing, becoming comfortable here, we converse about the aspects of God and they know each name. they are eager for the stories… and the stories teach, teach, and teach us all.

I am finding it such a challenge to accurately portray the experience of being here! I ask the kids: was this what you imagined it was like before you came? they all say that there is no way they could have imagined this. I am enthralled watching them changed and transformed by this experience, this place. every day a new experience unlike any other they have ever had… every day something new they learn, take in, become. and me as well… as Matthew says, we can only just catch a glimpse of how much we will be changed by this experience… changed in who we are, our spirit, our connection to God, to others on this planet, to our own lives, our own assumptions about life.

I am so emotional. at times filled with wonder and joy. at other times feeling emotional and like I could cry at the drop of a hat. sometimes irritated and angry. in the Meenakshi Temple when I meditated I was filled with an unbelievable bliss unlike anything I have felt before… it filled me up and then overflowed and I wept.

Matthew helped us to begin this journey with pooja and a sankalp: our deepest desire and intention for our lives. we are to understand that all that happens to us on this trip is about that sankalp manifesting. I have no doubt of that, and as I see us transformed I see why he was so intent on focusing us on the highest before we began.

a word from the others:

David:
The Third Lane
Indians don’t drive as much as dance in traffic. Like dance, someone leads, which is the person in front. Like dance, the movements aren’t always choreographed. In India the rules of physics are what guide the driver’s decisions. The lane divide means pretty much nothing. If there’s no oncoming traffic, then use that lane. Even if there is oncoming traffic and they only need some of their lane, go ahead and use the rest. Mass, velocity and available space are the predominate rules. That, and if given the choice, stay to the left. Yet despite what might appear to be total chaos, if you realize that everyone really is dancing to the same tune, then it’s easy to relax. It only seems like a steady stream of “close calls” if you don’t know how to dance.

Dania:
It is very fun and adventurous. I learned a lot from India so far. I am really enjoying myself. some things I learned was walk into traffic, you should eat with your hands, walk barefoot, water bottles at the table, wearing no shirt in a sacred place and do not say please or thank you.

Eliana:
It is very beautiful and spiritual but it is also very hot and sweaty. I like India a lot even though it is. After I come back home I think I will want to come back again. I definitely am changing a lot. We are going on a lot of adventures and I love it.

Hezekiah:
India is very wonderful! It is very hot. And California is very cold, that’s a nice change! The Meenakshi temple is awesome! Then, you can go to another temple and there is a elephant in temple the elephant will only eat temple foods of the temple. When the elephant gets an Indian coin, it gives the coin to its owner and it gives you a blessing.

India is very different than San Francisco. India is Hot and has big traffic. I even rode a scooter! And when they drive, they always drive so close to each other. Not only did I ride a scooter, I rode an elephant! The elephant was very bumpy.

Matthew:
to be here with my family is to see india from new eyes…so much love we are feeling, such deep integration—
seeing my nieces and nephew touch the feet of sanyasis and my Indian friends out of respect, exploring Indian food with family, meditating in the silence and wonder of huge temples altogether, discussing God, laughing in richaws, shopping in the market, looking up at the stars on a boat in the backwaters…with my family…what an adventure and powerfully integrative experience…what can be said of this magic…?

its only the end of day 3 and already we have been here for a lifetime

Day 2 in Bangalore was beautiful... went to a party of Matthew's friends where he was a cherished and honored guest, beloved by everyone present and honored as a teacher who gave them not only a beautiful technique, but valued knowledge. Matthew, of course, is so humble about it all, but it was amazing for us to experience him the way others here do. Mom and Dad would have been so proud. It was quite moving and the way he answered questions with Maharishi's knowledge was so simple and yet profound... a great refresher for us all. We were invited into the homes of many, and had a profound experience of what it is to be a Guest here: Namaste (seeing the divine in others) is not just a thing that is said, or a thing of history, but it is deeply and truly real, here. We were honored guests, driven everywhere, fed, and truly from their pleasure. In the US we have no idea, really, what it means to be a host.

Then Matthew, the kids and I flew to Madurai while David stayed back. He spent the next day (Monday) having a very successful meeting with ComplianceOnline -- both on the personal and professional level.

And today/Monday for us? What can I say except that it is the first among what I am sure will be many, many days that will change who we are as people profoundly. Have no pictures of the places we were at (they don't allow cameras inside) but will try to take some maybe tomorrow at least of the outside.

Eliana and Hezekiah have been sick on and off -- fine at one moment, then vomiting and sleeping the next... and still amazing troopers as they don't want to miss a thing and so deal with the intensity and the heat and insist they want to go. Dania has been incredibly present and rolling with it all with Matthew and I... just there and taking it all in.

We went to the Sri Meenakshi Temple -- at first they did not let us in and Dania, Matthew and I spoke with pundits, cried...and we ended traveling with a pundit to the center of town/village and walking away with certificates that we were officially Hindu, and went back with Eliana and Hezekiah. We were able to go in easily... not necessarily because of the certificates but only because this is India: sometimes things are easy and sweet, other times intense and not easy, and made offerings... it was powerfully hot and we found ourselves in the inner, inner sanctums of a temple where the aspect of God that is the Divine Mother has been worshiped and has lived for thousands of years. It is impossible to describe the power of it... we were all completely immersed and swimming in the energy and intensity.

After 6, Eliana and Hezekiah slept while Dania, Matthew and I went to a second temple, this one to Kartikeya, the powerful little boy aspect of God. This temple was softer, and less intense, but still very powerful. And it was night, and dark, and we took it all in. We were blessed by a 46 year old temple elephant, who touched our heads.

Madurai is deep into India. We get many stares, being rare foreigners, in our Indian garb thank goodness, with a guide who speaks Hindi, although the language here is Tamil, which Matthew does not know, at least he knows India and temples and how to navigate that world. They wanted to let him inside but for us to be left behind... he refused, of course. Here there are cows, and traditional dress, and food. No MacDonalds here. Will for sure take some photographs tomorrow. And bless Matthew for picking hotels for us that are "western" and comfortable, a little place to find refuge and "home" while we are in the intensity of it all.

And today was a day completely without shoes.

david's thoughts about driving in india

as anyone who has been here knows, the driving in india is pretty crazy... cars seem to drive on the wrong side of the road, merge haphazardly, cut horizontally across five lanes of traffic, no lane holding at all, horns constantly (meaning: hello, here I come, watch out, etc. depending on the situation) etc. at first, it is a bit nerve-wracking to go down the road... but, as david observed there are almost no near-misses at all. he has these theories so far as to why:
1. indians have a very different spatial awareness -- they seem to be able to pass by each other by foot, motorcycle, car, auto rickshaw, bicycle, etc. and to squeeze through incredible spaces (so many vehicles keep moving through bottlenecks that it would take americans hours and hours to move through).
2. the culture makes it possible -- there seems to be a deep, genuine desire for other people's happiness and well-being. to not create stress or unhappiness in others. and so there is allowance and tolerance for things like sharing, not having to be right all the time, etc.

p.s. one of my favorite things so far is the gentle head wiggle with a smile, which means something to the effect of "yes, yes, it's good, it's blissful, that's right, I agree." it's so sweet!

already a lifetime has gone by

voyage to Bangalore, India:
left SF at 10pm, Wednesday night
SF to Hong Kong: 15.5 hours
layover Hong Kong airport: 3 hours
Hong Kong to Delhi: 6.5 hours (met Matthew here!)
Delhi to Bangalore: 2.5 hours
airport to hotel: 1 hour, arriving at 10pm, Friday night
48 hours later. subtract 12 hours we lost crossing the date line.
total travel time: 36 hours.
The kids were totally amazing. Such troopers during an incredibly long journey! And we all are adjusting to the time rapidly, although we find ourselves a bit tired and spacey still, and getting hungry at odd times.

Matthew: amazing, loving, has arranged for every possible detail for us, for our comfort, happiness, enjoyment.
Matthew's friends: humble, sweet, loving, kind, incredible hosts. drive us everywhere, spend time with us whatever we are doing, accepting every state that we are in, giving us gifts.
Bangalore:
smells like incense, flowers, garbage, exhaust. incredible amounts of traffic, motorcycles, auto rickshaws, people, shops. people are kind, sweet, patient, easy.

Ended our first day with an unbelievable concert: Jayanta Kumar Das (with Tabla player) played Gandharva Veda sitar concert for us, friends of Matthew, and the two important contact people at ComplianceOnline (David's sister company). It was completely beautiful.

Today we buy more Indian clothes, attend a luncheon hosted by Matthew's friend, and fly to our next destination.

The Trip: Our Itinerary w/o Matthew's Magic Included

1. Depart San Francisco, 1:00AM on Wed. March 19th
Fly through Hong Kong to Delhi, meet Matthew in Delhi, get right on plane
2. Bangalore
see Jayanth play sitar, party with Matthew's friends, shopping for clothing for India, rest
3. Samantha, Matthew & kids fly to Madurai, David stays one more day in Bangalore to meet with ComplianceOnline. In Madurai see famous temple.
4. Train to Kanyakumari. See temples, go to Nagercoil and see snake temple, see statue of Hannuman.
5. Car to Varkala. Spend a couple of days by the ocean (purifying), relaxing.
6. Car to Allepy. Take a house boat for a couple of days down the backwaters.
7. Arrive at Kochin. Port town, spice trading, incense trading, Jewtown.
8. Fly to Varanasi. Spend several days at the doorway to the final dissolution where pure silence is enlivened.
9. Drive to Agra. See Taj Mahal.
10. Drive to Mathura, the birthplace of Krishna, one of the 7 holy cities of India, the final one for Matthew to see.
11. Brief stay in Delhi to see Akshardham Temple, make last minute purchases
12. Up to Rishikesh (where Maharishi's Ashram was) and Haridwar, the gateway to the Himalayas, passageway of monks and pilgrims.
13. Up to Uttarkashi, town at the base of the place where Maharishi choose for his Purusha.
14. Take raft trip down the Ganges back to Rishikesh/Haridwar.
15. Back to Delhi, fly to Hong Kong. Have either 1, 2, or 3 days there, still unclear.
16. Arrive back in San Francisco April 11, 12, or 13.